Things I've learned so far on exchange...

1. We should never underestimate the power of chocolate.
        - My mom has always told me that chocolate is an antidepressant. Because of these beliefs my mom would bring chocolate in the car when she picked me up from school after I had a test or just a rough day. There have been many days (I think all exchange students will agree with me when I say this) where I have wanted to throw in the towel or pull the covers over my head and stay in bed forever, but with a little bit of chocolate and a motivational speech in the mirror I was able to keep pushing myself. Of course sometimes the chocolate is just overindulgence, but I'm a teenager and an exchange student, so that's expected.

2. We should never underestimate the power of voice.
       - I chose this topic for several reasons. When I was a little kid I was pretty outgoing, but I still had trouble talking to strangers. When I had to trade my toy for ice cream at Chick-fil-A, I usually mulled it over in my mind and then decided that the my little pony action figure would suffice. I mean who needs dessert anyway? Now, I have learned that there are many things I need to do for myself. I no longer have my mom riding copilot and ready to fight my battles with me. Of course she is only a text message away, but there are many times that I have to speak up and tell people that I need something. I learned this quickly when I realized just how many times you have to bother the school secretary until you can get a bus pass. My point is that no one can read your mind. I know sometimes people can read your emotions and see when you are sad, but if you really want change or help it is your job to voice your feelings. In all of my experiences here I have noticed that most people will be happy to help once you tell them what you need.
      - My second point under this topic has to do with homesickness. This time of year is one of the worst months for exchange students because of how much we start to miss home. Our year has started to become normal, culture shock is still in full swing, and home starts to seem more and more appealing. The power of voice I am talking about here is the voice of familiarity. Of course it is good to keep yourself busy around town and become more integrated in your new environment. However, sometimes an exchange student will go through a rough day at school or feel lonely and depressed and need to talk to someone familiar. This familiar voice can make a huge difference in that exchange student's day. Even just receiving a motivational email or text message can make us feel much more hopeful. I will admit that I miss the southern accent and southern hospitality that I could find so easily in Memphis, so when I hear it here (this of course is very unusual) I get extremely excited. When we visited Munich on fall break, we heard a large group of southerners talking. Of course the first thing we all said was "Man they are so loud. Geez they must be from America;" however, as we kept listening it was the comforting southern drawl that made us all remember where we come from.


3. Books are an exchange student's best friends.
      - I will admit that it is pretty hard to make new friends in the middle of high school. This difficulty is definitely increased when you add the fact that I can't fully communicate with all the people in my school just yet. Although there are times when I feel comfortable to sit with a group of kids or talk with a friend between classes, there are also times when my friends are in class, and I have a free period. I have always been a book worm, and my love of books has definitely helped me stay occupied during school. Thus the lonely girl sitting on a bench is no longer lonely. She is just engrossed in a novel.

4. Smiling, laughing, and music are all universal languages.
     - One of the biggest stereotypes that people believe about Germans is that they have no sense of humor. However, every German I have met seems happy and knows how to make jokes and laugh. I also like how many people will smile at me at school. I was afraid that people would seem incredibly cold and distant compared to my southern upbringing where strangers will talk to you in the checkout line at Kroger. Instead, I was pleasantly surprised when strangers on the street said "Hallo" to me, and classmates smiled when we made eye contact. I just believe that smiling and laughing must be a universal language because everyone I have met is very lively and fun-loving. Music is also a universal language. It doesn't matter whether the song is in English, German, Spanish, or French; if it has a good beat people will dance. I play in an cello orchestra on Fridays, and we all enjoy playing music no matter what language it is in or where the composer is from. Music has always been a part of my life, and it is definitely a part of my German life too.

5. It doesn't really matter what people think about you.
        - I have always marched to the beat of my own drum, but of course there was always that little voice in my head telling me that I was weird or awkward. I would feel extremely hurt when I heard someone had been gossiping about me, and of course that hasn't totally gone away. These past few months have shown me that it's okay to look stupid or weird. It's okay to need help just as it's okay to ask for help. A few days ago I was walking to my bus, and some kid yelled something at me from across the school courtyard. His friend laughed, and for a second I felt confused and offended. Then I realized something. I had no idea what he had yelled to me, so what did it matter. I figured he needed to look cool for his friend, and that was okay. I didn't understand what he had yelled, so there was nothing that could hurt my feelings. In fact, I found it kind of funny. I started thinking about myself a year ago. I had no idea I would be in Germany yet alone in that situation, and for some reason that made me laugh. The fact that I was in that situation and didn't care at all made me laugh. One of the teamers in DC told me that your exchange year will strip you of your pride, and I definitely understand what she meant. I often catch myself laughing at the predicaments that I get into instead of worrying about how I look to other people. Usually it is normal everyday problems such as, butchering the name of a food when ordering at a cafe, getting lost in a new city, or missing my bus stop. For some reason this year has made me take myself a little less seriously. I think that's good. It isn't like I wake up and plan to make a fool out of myself. I do take myself a little bit seriously, but I don't take myself too seriously. I remember feeling awful and stressed out when just one thing went wrong, but now there is always something to laugh about. I am glad these past few months have taught me that. I don't know if I would've learned that so quickly without this year.

6. We are much stronger than we think we are.
           -If you had told me a year and a half ago that at the age of sixteen I would get on a plane and leave my home and family for a whole year, I would have probably looked at you like you were insane. I was that kid who could mentally convince herself that she could physically not run any longer during cross country practice, and until my coach yelled my name I would give up. I was also that kid who could stress over a test or a theatre production so much that I would get stress dreams and forget theorems and lines. There have been some tough moments on exchange (basically at least once every day) when I have felt lonely, homesick, confused, or just frustrated. Despite these feelings, however, I have never felt more confident in my ability to know where I am in the universe. Yes, there are days when giving up seems like the only possibility, but I am not the same girl who stopped running during cross country practice or stressed for weeks about tests and plays. I know where I am and I know where I want to go. I don't think I could've told people that I was independent a few months ago, but now I feel like I can take care of myself, push myself to reach further, and I probably know myself better than ever before.

It's been a while!

I know it has been a while since my last blog post, and I am very sorry for that. It has been hectic and confusing and all in all the most crazy few months of my life. I have been going to school and working on virtual school as well as trying to squeeze in a couple naps here and there. I also began taking cello lessons before my fall break, and they have been amazing so far! I will be going to orchestra on Friday nights starting this week.

 Believe it or not, I have finished 1/3 of my exchange year so far. I have been here for 3.5 months, and it has definitely been difficult. They warned us at orientation that the third and fourth months are always the hardest because things start to settle down and homesickness sets in. Of course, they were completely right! Many of the other exchange students agree with me when I try to explain how much I miss home. I have never been on such a crazy emotional roller coaster. Mostly I miss the familiarity of my home, my school, and my city. However, I hope that by the end of this year I will not want to leave Germany! :)

I have made a few friends at school, and everyone at school is very nice. I am attempting to exercise more because of all the yummy food in Germany, and I might even look into some nearby swim teams. I think keeping myself busy is the best medicine for missing home. I am excited for the holidays though too, and I think they will be very fun! I will be having a Thanksgiving at my host home the Saturday after Thanksgiving, but it will definitely be weird going to school on Thanksgiving. Since Christmas is my favorite holiday, I am super excited to celebrate and discover new traditions. I am especially excited to visit some Christmas markets and bake new Christmas cookies! I believe some of my family is going to visit in January, and that makes me extremely excited! I cannot wait to hug them again. It is really weird to think about the fact that I haven't hugged them in almost 4 months.

I promise the next post will come sooner! I miss you all, and I hope you have a wonderful week.